Overcoming Social Anxiety

Tips to Overcoming Social Anxiety

Do you often feel extraordinarily shy? Is it affecting you to the point that overcoming social anxiety is like a quest for you? You are not alone. More than 13% of people in the US have some form of anxiety problem. Social anxiety is caused when a person gets anxious before or at the time of interacting with other people.

People suffering from anxiety try to avoid all social gatherings or are forced to tolerate them under immense stress. This stress can be expressed visibly, e.g., perspiring heavily, flushing or experiencing tremors, etc. Stress can also manifest mentally. For instance, a person suffering from anxiety and great stress can start to form a low opinion of himself.

Overcoming Social Anxiety – How to Turn Negatives to Positives

One must realize that suffering from social anxiety and being shy are two different things. A shy person will not feel terror at socializing with unfamiliar individuals, whereas a socially anxious person would.

All of us at some level have a few reservations. At that level, we unconsciously express our reservations to the person(s) we are interacting with to take the cue. This may make people think that shy people are ‘weird’. So are you giving out cues that you are overtly shy or suffering from social anxiety?

Read on to realize what codes, cues or messages you may be sending out to other people.

You think (and speak) negatively of yourself.

Studies show that socially anxious people tend to perpetually criticize themselves in front of others. Now, if we are too engrossed in what impressions we are making, then it becomes nearly impossible to focus on the actual conversation, right?

So how do you solve this? Focus on the actual discussion (i.e., what is actually being said) rather than on what you think is being thought of you.

You don’t want to share anything about yourself.

People who are shy try avoid sharing things about themselves as much as possible. The problem with this situation is that as you become quieter, the more you are faced with probing questions! A conversation consists of a rhythmic pattern of responses from both ends, almost like a dance. Just as you cannot dance with a person who doesn’t want to, you cannot carry on a conversation with a person who doesn’t respond.

So how do you solve this? Take active part in the discussion! Don’t just be a listener; try to be a conversationalist.

You end up in downward spiral of misery.

If you focus on negative things during conversations, you are no longer able to enjoy the subject of discussion and thus, cannot interact properly. It’s like a Catch 22.

You don’t pay attention during conversations because you’re too busy thinking about what others MAY be thinking. As such, you lose the thread of the conversation, preventing you from responding properly. As others notice that you’re not interested, they, in turn, lose interest in talking with you. And this ‘turn off’ adds to your social anxiety.

So how do you solve this? Put a smile on your face!

True, it’s not easy overcoming social anxiety but it can denifitely be done especially if you keep the above tips in mind.

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